We all know how frustrating it is when someone else labels you, especially if it’s a label you never would have chosen for yourself. It can make you feel like you’ve been put in a box, like they can’t see beyond one or two prominent aspects of your personality.
Unfortunately, we all tend to categorize people.
Categorizing people based on the first things we notice about them just seems to be human nature. It’s how our brains keep track of things, and it makes it easier for us to process new information. But perhaps it’s time to think beyond those boxes and acknowledge the many shades of gray.
Here’s how to not categorize people and accept them for who they truly are.
Stay Aware and Present
Nowadays, it seems like we’re always a little bit distracted. But when you meet someone new, staying present and aware is key.
In order to understand who someone is beyond the sum of their parts, take it all in—what they say, their body language, the way they make you feel. Paying close attention is the only way to get an idea of who they truly are as a person, beneath the surface and the easy labels.
Reflect on Your Own Complexity
Sometimes, we fail to give ourselves credit for the fact that we are all complex individuals—we contain multitudes. We try to label ourselves, squeeze ourselves into narrow definitions, and make ourselves smaller to please others. But when we do this, we do ourselves and others a disservice.
When you can’t recognize your own complex nature, you won’t be able to see it in other people and simply categorize them. If you acknowledge that you can’t be summed up by one label, you understand that no one else could be either.
Practice Active Listening
Too often, we don’t truly listen to people when they speak, and this causes us to categorize people. But if we want to understand the essence of a person, active listening is crucial.
Thus, when you’re in the midst of a good conversation with someone, take in everything they say. Do your best not to zone out and let their words get past you. Most importantly, don’t tune them out because you think you already know what they will say.
Don’t Discourage Expression
Many people get nervous when they share things about themselves because they assume that others simply won’t understand. So, if someone tells you something personal that surprises you, give them space to be vulnerable and respect what they’re sharing. Don’t make a joke at their expense or act like it’s shocking.
People feel pressure to stay in the boxes that others put them in, so when they take a step out, it’s best to be encouraging rather than discouraging. You never know how much courage it took them to share their truth with you.
Ask Questions
Go past the shallow end. Put in the effort to learn new things about people. Dig a little deeper. You never know what you might find out about someone when you simply take the initiative to ask. You may think that you have a good idea of who they are, but perhaps you don’t know them as well as you think you do.
Sometimes, people are just dying to share more about themselves, but they keep quiet because they assume that no one would be interested. Prove that this isn’t the case!
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